Dream Journal (July 18th 2016)

I was asked by a dance choreographer friend of mine if I could assist him in working the door of a queer party in the Upstate of South Carolina. I had to wear all black & participate in a company sing along.  It was a show celebrating sexual freedom.  

I consulted with my girlfriend if I should do it or not and she said I should stating "you're part of the atmosphere"-- so I agreed.

It was the day of the show and it slipped my mind, I called and texted, trying to get out of it as I was attending another event, but I left them hanging & I felt horrible.  It was 30 minutes till show time, but I happened to be 15 blocks away.  I was picked up in a van, taken to a place where my all black costume pieces were hanging and given a walkman with the music I was to learn. 

Gosh I didn't want to do this.  I got dressed in a long black sleeved T-shirt & stretchy jeans.  I popped in the music and away I went holding a grudge to those that asked me to participate-- feeling absolutely overwhelmed.  

Then, a breaking point.  I told myself to relax, told myself that I'm just a small part of the show, and the burden of 10,000 heavy loads was lifted away. I was free with the most relaxing natural high. I was joyously walking down the street listening to the walkman.  Everything was ok.  My rate for working the event was $150.